It is approximately at 5 in the twilight while the thunders strike and rumble outside, it is raining heavily. Does god show his concern to this child? Does “he” want me to know that he is there? – Thoughtful of my feeling. That’s why the whole world seems to be sad and gloomy as well. Murky perhaps should be said!!!
“Dear Allah, Thanks for always watching after me Alhamdullillah”
Regards,
A little child - DUDU
OK, on the other side here it is the more and more nauseating Real Player which keeps on repeating the same song for thousands. “HAENGBUK” by “SUPER JUNIOR – it is neither I hate the song nor the singer but what exactly I refer is not the mood to listen to it. One sip of coffee to be had, another stick of cigarette puffed to accompany my indescribable evening. This evening- Yes, it is hard to be explained, there is no appropriate word to illustrate it out - Sad? Not really, Frustration? IDTS! Boring? That’s even more far-flung than what I am exactly undergone. Perplexity is a bit closer but still imprecise. What is the word? IDK may be puzzlement?
A combination of little tiny smile and LOL drawn on my face when I take a look on my real player, they are all old songs, old series of “survivor” and “Lost” and bundles of outdated movies. I think my cool lifestyle have been taken away since the day I’ve became a practicum teacher began. I didn’t have much time even to chill with my friends, so don’t bother to update my stuff on this “lappy”. What a lame lame lame days I’ve been through. Lame? Did I say that word “lame”? It wasn’t fellas! It was just another poles apart kind of days, unpredictable sequence of events that I love to say: I AM PROUD OF IT!!! Damn Hell Yeah hehehehehe (New discovery - ok this is the first time I know that Microsoft word able to draw a smiley. Hahahahahahahaha)
The papers on my bed, various colours of markers as well as the unmanaged log book indicate there is someone inside me who am not used to be me. It is kind of another version of “Dudu”. Brotherly version of me, darling to all and I have no word to depict it. It just it! Another part of me - Another character built unconsciously during this whole three months.
Is it true? Three months of practicum teaching is nearly reach the end? OMG! It still fell so yesterday when I started my practicum with a huge big FUCK IT LORD. Now it feels so tomorrow that I have to end it precisely in the same way. FUCK IT AGAIN. I don’t want to know them at the very first place. Now I don’t want to leave them already. Argh, what happen to me? Just a second I think this way, next would be a different. So I guess “Just leave it there”.
Dear Geraldine, I am not so sure either you read this post or not. All I want to say to you. Thanks for everything. You are one of those friends that I am proud to call a buddy. You are just different than others that I’ve known previously. Almost everyone in UNIRAZAK knows. They keep on chattering and stay on nattering about me but please it was not bothering. Let’s recall: “braggy”, “backstabber”, and “drama king”, what a day back then in campus life. And you, you are just different. I thank god for having you by my side during this past three months. And my “hutang” – I’ll pay you next week, May I? I have some difficulties that I encounter recently and I just can’t avoid it. Sorry dear buddy. Apart than that, I think I should mention another common name: Guess, who do you think? Yes, sure, she is … Stephanie? Hahahahah Steff? I just don’t know what to say about this? So I think I just postpone it until some other times. It would be another humorous and glamorous and fabulous and ridiculous subject to be mumbling about. **huge smile**
Students… They are babyish, frenzied and preposterously compelling. Some of them keep on asking me who is my favorite? How can I answer that effortlessly and straightforwardly when all of you are too “baby-boo” to me? But yeah, I got three or four favorites but if I have to name them? I decline it fellas. Hahahahah.
For this post, I think I just say three names: Miss Geral –Mr Christopher and Mr Qayyum. Huh, a big and long sigh over here. Can’t you hear it, can you? What should I do this both young men from 4 ANGGERIK. They are making me flabbergasted, feeble, frail and another F words (negative feeling). I don’t mean that word, just another joke. I think I should say: no matter how you respond to me, no matter how you act towards me afterwards, I’ll take it with a huge smile, I know deep inside it was all my mistake. Dear buddies, my bad! Should I “ketuk ketampi” over here? **Freaking LOL ** and **damn LOL** again and again and again. But when I say sorry, please take a note “I DO MEAN IT”
A simple message to Chris:
Let’s go directly to the point: Did I hit you on face? If so, I don’t have any other words but sorry. It is such a big embarrassment for me. I did not mean it.
As I recall, I was hugging you as well if I am not mistaken. Why do remember the sux (not appropriate to be used) thing when there is something better to be memorized? And of course the kiss as well (wakakakakakaka) if you insist that I am drunk, I’ll take it without hard feeling and I’ll pay attention on that in future. SORRY BHA GENK!!!
A simple message to Qayyum (someone favorite) hehehehehe:
Hmmm, what should I say to you? What should I do? Things get complicated when you decide not to talk anymore and I admit it was my fault at the bottom line. My harsh words, as a teacher, I am not taking back my words. As a young man to another young man, I think you deserve to get angry. Can’t you just spill your angry out? I can take it with a smile. Hmm, so sorry! (sambil memegang both my telinga)
Dear God,
I am talking to you again, please bless these two children. Even though they are acting tough, they are just like another naïve baby brother that needed to be cared. Bless them please!
Regards,
Their PSK Teacher
Since I am talking to 4A young men, so I guess it’s better to talk about them all. I was assigned to teach them PSK at first. What is this subject by the way? F*** it! How on earth I am going to teach something that I was not really trained? Then I started to learn instead of keep on complaining. I think I am able to catch up but then when I think I was doing just fine, I was told to teach English suddenly. OK THIS IS ANOTHER F*** IT!!! Damn!!!
Where the heck I am mumbling already? Hahahah… this is so me. I supposed to talk about a thing but then I go different way. So I guess, a tiger doesn’t change it strips after all. Am I using the perfect proverb, ain’t I? (ain’t is not a Queen English) whatever!!! Hell I care. So, where were we? Ahah, 4 Anggerik. I got a story about a boy named Gilbert. I was talking to Gilbert before the raining. As usual, we talk about a lot of things. He always expresses what he thinks but his friends tend to misunderstand. I don’t know what to tell him but one thing that clear:
“Just chill, Gil. If it is not today is not the day yet. If it is not tomorrow, it will be some days you find someone who proud to be your friend. But if you demand for something, you should learn to tolerant over something. If you want to be heard then begin to listen and I believe that you will be doing OK.” –Dudu Feerdaus Ahmad ensures you that. You have a quality of being a loyal buddy, but at your age: that quality is almost unneeded. Until the time comes, you just have to be patience.
Other stuff, the raining still affects me. The flu, coughing and now fever are irritating ruins my night. I can’t sleep at all. How I wish I could fall asleep so tomorrow won’t become a problem to get awake early in the morning. But I just cannot put the blame on others since I am the one who KOBUSAKLY playing in the rain. Hahahah it’s been so long I haven’t MANDI HUJAN. It was a great pleasure experience for a teacher like me. I guess I should recommend this method to all stressed teacher on the globe.
To all 4 A, I knew my words were a bit harsh. I just cannot help it. May God bless u All... and my best wishes for everyone… and the little sister, who adopts me, thanks much much DARL. I am glad u choose me, Justine Bierber Fanatics (yew)
It’s time for 4 T: Teratai? It sounds more like Tokek to me!!! hahahah… Lets end it here, when it comes for this class, believe me, it takes too long than what you could imagine. So my super precious kids 4T, just chillex hermanitas, hermanitos as well as Miss Kobusak two thousands and ten. I’ll talk about you guys some other times.
Not to be forgotten – my one and only 4C? I can tell what happen next. This is going to be heard in the class “sir, sir ne kan, balik balik 4 T. Kin panas ne” remember this, this time is not our time yet. This time, cancel class… they are surely liking it … hahahahahha :D I am running out of time, where is my laundry just now??? Hish…Before I leave,
Dear God,
Do you have little time for me? It won’t be long, I promise! It just something comes up and I think I should say it before I lose all the remaining times I’ve got. And this is just a little tiny praying. Please grant it… Bless them please… Ok Bye, God
Regards,
SOMEONE NERD YET HOT (wakakakk)
So my people,
until then, see ya soon…..
DEAR GOD, WILL YOU LISTEN TO ME???
CHAU - LATER!!! – SALAM SATU TOKEK ching!!!
